Blog Post 7: Losing Isaiah Review

    As a group, while we didn’t think “Losing Isaiah” wasn’t the most quality of films, it successfully presented many important ethical issues in adoption.

    First, the birth mothers rights were completely ignored. This is evident when Halle Berry’s character Khaila, isn’t given any papers when the adoption is finalized with Margret and Charles. Although she left her child in the garbage at the start of the film, she is still the birth mother and was not informed of what was happening with her child. The film did a good job at portraying the emotions of a woman who has lost her child. Halle Berry’s character was clearly a mourning mother, as she was caring for her friend’s children and never forgets about her own baby. It also shows both sides of a story, which is important in understanding a situation as complicated as this.

    The film displayed racial issues in adoption in an accurate way. The scene in the bathroom with Margret and Khaila was representative of the silent racism in society as they begin using race as a weapon against one another when it’s really the situation that they’re feeling hostile about. Another good example is the courtroom scene where Samuel L Jackson’s character is questioning Margret about how she’s culturing Isaiah and it’s clear that she isn’t introducing any black culture to him on purpose. It’s shown on the lawyer’s face that this is a problem for his case. The film blatantly states several times that a black child should be with it’s black mother. Whether this is proven to be true cannot be known because at the end both families come together to raise the child in both cultures.

    After watching the film, it seems that there are both positive and negative sides of adoption shown. An example of the negative would be the judicial fighting over who the child should live with, the emotional rollercoaster on both sides, and potentially scarring Isaiah. A positive example would be that he is not left alone in the hospital but has people he can rely on and a good home. However, the positive seems to outweigh the negative because it’s getting the issue across of race in adoption to the general viewing public.

Losing Isaiah. Dir. Stephen Gyllenhaal. 1995. DVD.

Judy Post 6

Michael Post 6

Mickey Post 7

Jenna Post 6

Blog Post #6: Different Views on Transracial Adoption

To begin this blog post, I will start with Adam Pertman’s chapter three in “Adoption Nation.”  One important comment that Pertman makes is, “…Incorporating an adopted child’s heritage and history into daily life is invariably invaluable,” (67).  As we have discussed in class discussions, this is true.  Pertman states that is possible if parents start, “establishing role models and making friends of that race or ethnicity,” (67).  I think that is one of the most important points to make about transracial adoption because transracial adoptees who have role models of the same heritage or culture will probably have a better view of themselves, and if they are struggling they can talk to someone. 

One thing from Pertman’s chapter that made me wonder was his comment on how adoption is, “helping to crack the walls of prejudice and intolerance on a broader scale,” (70-71).  He states, “There are innumerable white grandparents, uncles, aunts, and cousins, for example, who have surprised themselves with the unconditional love they feel for their new black or Asian or Hispanic relatives, and who have learned critical lessons as a result,” (70).  I understand where Pertman is coming from.  However, do these white grandparents, uncles, aunts and cousins think about the cultural aspects as well or are they happy because the baby is growing up in a white culture?  I think the walls of prejudice can be broken only if everyone is on the same page with having the adoptee participate in cultural enriching activities.   I hope that made sense…  This part of Pertman's chapter made me think of the movie, "The Blind Side."  In the movie, Sandra Bullock's character decides to adopt a Black teenager and include him in the Christmas card.  However, when she sends the Christmas card out to family, the response from them is, "Do you know there is a colored boy on your Christmas card?"  While I like Pertman's optimistic view, I still think there is more that would need to be done for extended family to understand race and ethnicity.  

Now, looking at Kim Park Nelson’s article, “Shopping for Children in the International Marketplace,” you can see she has a very different view on transracial adoption.  One area I found interesting was Nelson’s discussion from the remarks on race in some of the authors she critiques.  She states, “These remarks illustrate parents’ denial of the complexity and difficulties people of color face in the United States because the authors only see how diversity benefits them, explicitly ignoring how it might disadvantage others,” (102).  I think her point can be true for some, but not all transracial adoptive parents.  Some parents may forget the issue or race, etc. when adopting because they may think that since the child is growing up with a white family that all their problems of race will go away, when it reality it will most likely not be like that.   It’s important when adopting to think of ALL of the child’s needs. 

Finally, one area from Nelson’s article that I did not like was her critique on books that guide transracial adoption.  While I understand that Nelson thinks the books sound like manuals for a new product, etc., I still believe it is important for perspective parents to have something to relate to when it comes to transracial adoption.  Transracial adoption, from what we have read, is a huge decision, and it takes a lot of time.  Perhaps perspective parents can find comfort in reading these books on the adoption process.  I believe Nelson is being a little too over critical on this part. 

-Mickey N.

      

Blog Post #5 Transracial Adoption Thoughts

This week's discussion of racism is one that is of particular interest to me during this semester of my college career. I am in a Civil Rights Rhetoric/Public Address class in addition to the Adoption Ethics class that this blog is a part of. This perfectly illustrates to me the benefits of learning at a liberal arts college, where I can take two completely separate subjects that I'm learning about and begin to see how they might intertwine with one another.
This week's topic is transracial adoption. After reading the 'National Association of Black Social Worker's (NABSW) 1972 Position Statement on Trans-Racial Adoption', I begun to think about some of the topics we've covered in my other class. One stance that could be taken is that people are different and should be treated as such. The other is that we are all people and should be considered equal, without being kept separate in any way. This is what I would consider the 'color blind' way of thinking about things.
I see both sides of the issue. In Linda Faye Williams article, 'The Constraints of Race' she discusses white skin privilege. She claims, "The very gains from the civil rights 'revolution of the 1960s have been transformed in nearly Orwellian fashion into a weapon to be used against people of color in the new reconstruction of race and poverty. The new racism virtually hinges on the insistence that 'discrimination is illegal; everyone has equal rights, so what's the problem?'" (Williams, p93). People believe that because they aren't outrightly cruel or acting against other ethnic groups that it means they are not racist. However, American society continually perpetuates stereotypes that allow us to differentiate ourselves from one another based on appearance alone. Especially white people, since we haven't ever faced the same overwhelming prejudices in this country that other minority groups have. This is wrong and unfortunate but it is something that I feel is built into us all. We must consciously remind ourselves to act against our personal prejudices so that our society can inch towards complete acceptance. The Multi-Ethnic Placement Act which we read about from encyclopedia.adoption.com (http://encyclopedia.adoption.com/entry/Multiethnic-Placement-Act-MEPA/233/1.html) is one thing that I believe is positive in the realm of adoption ethics. I do believe that a person's background and culture should be acknowledged and learned about; but the adopted child can take that to the extent to which he or she wishes. One of the NABSW's statements about transracial adoption between white parents and black children is that the parents attempts to teach their adopted child how to deal with racism or the differences in their bodies is unnatural. To quote them exactly, "These actions highlight the unnatural character of trans racial adoption, giving rise to artificial conditions, logically lacking in substance. Superficialities convey nothing of worth and are more damaging than helpful." (http://pages.uoregon.edu/adoption/archive/NabswTRA.htm) I think this is a little insulting to the parent child relationship. A parents willingness to celebrate what makes their adopted child unique, while also loving them for who they are is very special and should not be called 'superficial' or made to seem demeaning in any way. There are other matters in which certain people who would not be able to provide the child with those things, should not adopt transracially... but that's a completely different matter.
Although racism is painful and the issue of 'microagressions' (Tuan & Shiao) may be a problem throughout life. In the end, hopefully the adopted child is going to grow up feeling loved for who they are and will be thankful for the life they have. Then, they can make the choice as to what they want to know about their backgrounds, as the empowered adoptee.

Blog Post #5: Transracial Adoption

The topic of racism in adoption is actually quite a touchy one and I never would have really thought of it in the ways mentioned in class but I guess it is a sensitive topic. I suppose the reason I never really thought much of it was because, I just realized this in class not too long ago, I am actually part of a transracial adoption family. My brother was adopted from Colombia when he was just four months old so I have always grown up not seeing somebody by their color. Through this I find my life to be quite special because of how little diversity I experienced growing up in tiny town, boondocks Minnesota. In fact, my brother and I belonged to the only family that brought diversity to our town. I admit it was very interesting growing up and being asked all the questions like "He isn't your real brother, is he?" or "Is he adopted?" to which I would always answer "Yes, he is my real brother because we have grown up together and we have been there for each other ever since I was born. We may not be blood related but we are of one soul." or "Actually yes, he is adopted... and so am I. I find our lives to be genuine.

This is why I was so shocked when I took the IAT (Initial Autonomic Test) for Black/White preference and it scored me as moderate preference towards Whites. I don't find myself at all as a person that consciously or subconsciously segregates people. I try to make it a point in my life to be the best person I can to everyone and treat everyone as I would like to be treated. This is why I don't believe that this test is very reliable and that I don't really trust technology to judge my own personality when there are so many things that can skew the outcome. I would prefer to be analyzed, in a way, by a professional and in person. A computer can't decipher the true morals and ethics of a persons identity when really I could turn out to be a serial murderer or the next pope if I just chose the right answers the computer agrees with.

Michael

Blog Post #5: Racism and Adoption

After our discussion in class on Tuesday, it's interesting to hear people's perspectives on racism.  One observation I made during class on Tuesday is the number of people who put the church as a source for positive messages.  I found that to be surprising because church would be at the bottom of my list or the least reliable.  I say this because when we think of the images when it comes to Jesus and the people in the Bible, the images are all of white people when they were really Middle Eastern.  I understand the church says we need to love our neighbor, etc., but when I went to church in pasty white Sartell, all I saw was judgment whenever one African American person walked in the church.  I would look at the people, and they would be staring with wide eyes.  Sad thing, we would never see the new people again.  How is this a positive message?    

Another thought that came to me from Tuesday’s discussion is how I never thought of the challenges that transracial adoption people face.  I like to think that we would love each other no matter what.  However, even a person who is adopted from an African country or Asian country and grows up in the United States faces a lot of challenges.  This scares me in a way.  I want to adopt some day, and I want a baby from an Asian country or an African country.  Will things be better when I want to adopt or will our still need a lot of help with racial issues?  I want my child to have a fulfilling and positive life.  Plus, the fact that my child is going to have to deal with having two dads instead of a mother and father is going to be hectic too.  It’s sad that racism still exists a lot, even though I believe each and every one is racism to some degree.  I hope our society can continue to get to know each other more and more and embrace culture.   

-Mickey N. 

Blog Post #4 Option 1:

This week's theme of open vs. closed adoption practices is an intriguing element of adoption that I have never fully considered before. Adam Pertman's book, "Adoption Nation" was a great source to learn about people experiences with closed adoption. He presents many good arguments for the importance of open adoption policies and does his best to sway the reader by pointing out all of the benefits of having open adoption records. Although he is clearly biased in the book, I'm going to assume that his description of events such as 'the Fredericks' story and the variety of inconsistent laws across the United States, are true. Pertman says, "The list of disparate, confusing, and conflicting adoption statutes and regulations runs from coast to coast" (Pertman, p56). He more than provides enough information to decide that openness in adoption is the right way to go. 

The Anita Allen readings provided a similar approach to the Pertman readings; it begins with a story about adoptive parents that ended up in an uncomfortable situation with their daughters birth parents. She follows up by describing two models of adoption called fusion and configuration. The configuration model is one where the adopted child doesn't know their birth parents until they become older, if ever at all. Whereas the fusion model is one where there is a relationship maintained. She says, "Adopting parents gain family members but birth parents do not lost family members" (Allen, p53). In my eyes, the second situation has a variety of ways that it could go wrong and it worries me a bit, for the psychological well being of everyone involved. However it could become a very good thing as well. Allen claims that she, "does not think legislators should outlaw contact between birth and adoptive families, or even discourage it" (Allen, p51). But she also doesn't think that adoptive parents should be forced to maintain a relationship with the birth parents if they don't believe it's a good choice. I also agree with her viewpoint here.

On Tuesday, when the speaker came to tell our class about her adoption story, she seemed frustrated by her inability to seek out her true history through the documents that have been kept from her over the years. She kept her spirits up and had a sense of humor but I felt like I could hear in her voice how much hurt it had caused her in the past. Her story is one that I feel for. I believe she's more than old enough to be able to search out the information that could potentially help her medically, and if she wants to find out who her birth parents are, if they're even still alive, I don't see many terrible downsides. Ultimately I think it's the real life stories that really hit me hard. The two women that have spoken to us thus far haven't been trying to convince the class to go out and work for open records, per say, they've simply shared their painful experiences. This is convincing enough for me to say that I think a certain level of openness in adoption records is important for every state and that they should become uniform throughout all of the U.S. to make it an easier situation to navigate for everyone involved.

Graded Post #3: We Are Loved

The speaker we had on Tuesday was an amazing experience to have. As a fellow adoptee I found that her story was the closest one that I could relate to. I relate to her talking about the shocking possibility of her meeting her birthmother completely unexpectedly because I had the same experience only I actually met her unexpectedly. I loved the way she addressed the subject of wanting to meet her birthparents but was hesitant to do so because she wanted to get over the loss of her adoptive mother first. That shows respect and I admire that.

On a different topic, I would like to address the readings for Tuesday from Chapters 2 and 4 in Adam Pertmans’ “Adoption Nation.” First, I would like to rant on this quote from Chapter 2. Pertman states, “I don’t look forward to explaining this to our kids, but there’s no sugar-coating the bottom line: Adoption was our second choice. / The mistake many people make with that knowledge is concluding that second choice means second best” (p. 45). Pertman, prior to these sentences, states that he and his wife tried everything to get pregnant but it never happened. I would be sort of hurt from this statment coming from an adoptee perspective. Even though my father would have made the correct ethical choice to tell me that I was their back-up plan I would still feel insignificant and unwanted… sort of an outsider even more than I would be if I was actually their first choice. Pertman does, however, try to address that we, as adoptees, shouldn’t take this numbing knowledge as us being a “second choice [meaning] second best.” I think adoptive parents will go through these discussion on ethical thinking and understanding but if we only stick together in the fight for understanding through love and respect for one another then we won’t feel lonely or feel “second best.” As adoptees we must understand that our adoptive parents made the choice to find us and guess what… they picked us out of everyone else in the world that was waiting for their turned to get adopted. When in thought we might be the “second choice,” we are the first ones that they love most now and we must respect them for searching us out and picking us over everyone. That is what makes us special and that is how we should live our lives… loved.

Posted by: Michael O.